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Subject:Optional To Read
Time:11:42 pm
Frank: "Dude, check that out. There's a chick dressed like Sailor Moon. That's Hot."
Jarod: "That's a guy."
Frank: "Lets get the hell out of here."
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Subject:News for the end of the world.
Time:03:04 pm
HM: "Hello ladies and gentlemen, Im Harold Maxwell with your evening news."

"A sad day in the world of politics today. Former President Bush, the only President to be elcted 7 times in a row, died at the age of 97. Elton John rose from the grave to sing a touching rendition of "Candle in the Wind" (reworded as "Bush on the Plains") and Bush's wife, former songstress Celine Dion, joined him for a tearful version of "My Heart Will Go On", however was unavailable for comment as to whether or not she will return to the stage. Now to Marty for sports. Marty:"

Marty: "Thanks Harold, in sports the Detroit Tigers won their 14th straight World Series last night. However, 4 Tigers now face up to life in prison after the body of a woman was found beaten and raped in one of the players room. Boy, ever since steroids were legalized in game play Detroit has been unstoppable. Congrats boys. Here's Aaron with the weather."

Aaron: "Another scorcher today, with temperatures reaching up into the 140's. Haha, we'll all be thanking global warming for such nice sun tans at the next pool party, eh Harold?"

Harold: "We Sure Will"

Aaron: "And no break in sight as temps move up into the 150's for the next few days, with winds of up to 70 MPH. My advice to you, stay inside and cath the series finale of The Simpsons tonight. I know that's what Ill be doing"

"HM: "Me too, How are those Ice Caps looking Aaron?"

Aaron: "Haha, not too good Harold. Im sure we'll be swimming to work sooner or later."

HM: "We'll all be in a little better shape at least. Now to Monica for your Entertainment report"

Monica: "Who will take home the Oscar for best picture this year?" We've got the answers coming up after a short break."
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Subject:What in the hell.
Time:09:58 am
I dont like when people use the word baby to show being excited. I just dont. I feel like Im reading the livejournal of soome backwoods retards and all he's doing is trying to make friends, but he's stuck in the woods, so to him "baby" and proably "radical" are still cool phrases.

People that use the word baby in exclamation are just social retards really. They just want to be cool, but all they can come up with is this ridiculous catch phrase that was tuned out in 1988 with acid washed jeans, and whatever the latest Phil Collins cd was.

Welp, back to another long ass day of work pretending that I care that your pizza isn't cooked enough. I obviously took it out of the oven early, because I dont like you.
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Subject:Random
Time:01:30 am
Weird...

I turned the TV on when I got home, and it was playing the exact thing I was watching when I turned the TV off earlier. And it was playing within 30 seconds of when I turned it off in the show.

Weird (beard)

I also discovered the brilliance of the fight club soundtrack, that I bought 6 months ago, tonight. Truly awesome.
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Subject:Reall? Fag?
Time:02:03 am
Remember those kids that randomly call you a fag. They apparently like to gather around the Meijer gas station late at night. And continue their high school passion of calling everyone gay, or a fag. Im sure it's a huge rush to them, but seriously. What have you just accomplished by calling me, someone whom you don't even know, a fag. Nothing. Because Im just going to comment on how dumb you are and then move on with my life. In this case we went back and hassled them. But our joke was clever and semi thought out. Their joke was old, and over used, and inaffective. The next time someone calls you a fag, be sure to go up to them and critique their insult.

"Fag? Really? Was that the best thing you could say? No semi clever stupid car insult, or maybe a knock at me smoking. Why don't you just not waste your breath if you're not going to at least be clever."

I think that would get the job done. Possibly cause them to errupt in anger and attempt to start a fight. But if I have to fight somebody to get the words fag and gay taken out of insult rotation I will. They're just overused, and cause no harm. You might say, if it causes no harm let them be. But no, it's the principle behind it. They're attempting to insult me, and don't even posses the mental ability to make up something a little more impacting.

Kill Bill: brilliant.
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Subject:Tortoise
Time:02:25 am
Simply puts Tortoise is a brilliantt band. And their livee show provveed even more so. Ill admit I just got into them the other day after buying their new cd. But they were truly incerdible.

Opener 1 (The Eternals) hadd some kind of cool grooves, but were immediately ruiined once the singing began. Some people just don't have the ability to sing. And most people realize this when playing in a band, and understand that it doesn't sound good. But apparently not them.

Opener 2 (Beans)Was ccool when there was no pre recorded beat playing through the speakkers from his iPod. And when it was just beat poetry.

But Tortoise made up for it all, with an awesome set. An onslaught of great drumming and music just in general. Plus there were sweet visuals after the secret agent attack. And an added bonus with a super awesome crowd.
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Subject:The Fearsome Foursome and their Umptrip.
Time:02:52 am
Went to Umphrey's and watched a drunk man pass out, and fall out his chair and hit his face right on the ground. Then turning him over and seeing blood dripping down from his mouth was an added bonus. About 10 mins later when the security gaurds finally left him alone on the bench, he fell over agian. Then proceeded to puke all over himself. It was sweet.

Some gilrs reminded us that we were minors at the light, by drunken yelling at us. All she could say was "You're minors". Which slightly confused us, them thinking we were miners and all. Then we realized that none of us actually thought that, and we were really just thinking how hillariously stupid they were.

Lesson of the night: Joints are expendeble, if you burn it in the middle by mistake. Just throw it out the window.

If you currently are a stupid hippie: please don't talk to me while Im enjoying the music. Keep it to yourself.

And finally, if you see a man wearing a cowboy hat at a show, that looks a little goofy. Just slap him in the face, or punch him in the throat immediately. So he understands you mean it when you inform him that it's harder to enjoy the music when someone is screaming in your ear.
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Subject:Flying Croc!!!!
Time:01:09 am
Im going to play right into adult swims plan here and post about Flying Shark Vs. Flying Crocodile.

Im glad Flying Crocodile won!! Because Flying Shark and everyone that supported him was a loser. This was the best contest ever. Everyone knew how dumb it was, but somehow ended up in that conversation about it during the last week. And thats how you realized it was awesome.

So Flying Shark got what was coming him in the end, and adult swim got exactly what they wanted.
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Subject:Lost all Faith
Time:11:44 pm
I just got home. Im soaking wet. My hands and toes are numb. And Ive lost all faith in my family.

At about 10:00 I was driving home from Brighton, and had just passed the Brigthon Grand River exit on 96, when suddenly my back tire blows out.

Shit.

Swerve a little bit, the rain didn't help. Pull over. Check out damage. Everything but the blown out tire seems fine. Check trunk for spare and jack.

Shit.

I had removed them both when I had to get my front tires replaced a couple of weeks ago. Ohh well, Ill bum my step-dad out but he'll come out here and help me out. I believe in my family that much. Grab phone.

Shit.

Im in that ohh so great area where I get no service on my phone. So then I get out in the rain, with my shorts and sandals on (I still say that was a good idea) and walk down the expressway seacrching for a place where my phone will have service. Constantly stepping in huge puddles of mud, and water. Find a spot call my house. Phone rings, no one answer, answering machine doesnt pick up. Gotta love those families that have call waiting but dont answer the call when they are on the other line. Utterly useless.

Try calling my brother. (First indication that I can have no faith in my family) Would rather not go and get spare and jack because "Dude, South Park just started." So I tell him that he can enjoy that south park and have fun.

Call house, and finally get a hold of my step dad, because my moms in Florida currently. He reluctantly says okay, but right when I sit back and relax with my cigarette and Led Zeppelin - Ten Years Gone, my phone vibrates, and I see my mom is two-waying me. Must be worried if she's calling from florida. (Final indication that I can have no faith in my family) Answer phone, and have my mom yelling at me about responsibility. Which is true, it was irresponsible of me not to put that right back in the trunk. But I tell you, if I ever had kids and this scenario arose, the first words out of my mouth would be are you alright, is everything okay.

So I went back in my car so that I didnt have to listen to my mom anymore since I wont have service. Feeling pretty bummed out right now. And while watching the traffic pass by and listening to the rain softly fall on the roof. I realized that really, I can have no faith in my family for anything.

This might sound immature and me just being mad at my family. But I once skipped class and drove from Yspsilanti to Novi to rescue a friend who was stranded. A FRIEND!! My own brother can't do it from Howell to Brighton, because he'll miss South Park. I even skipped out on a quiz. And all my mom could think about was how irresponsible I was, and felt it so important to call me from Florida to tell me so.

While I was typing this she called me again. To yell more. And I calmly thanked her for tonight and how she showed me not to have faith in my family. Then she turned off her phone.

It was a good learning experience for me really. And my Mom was shook pretty hard by my statement to her. But really if you look at the whole situation it's pretty pathetic how my brother didnt care enough to miss south park, and all my mom was concerned about was how irresponsible I was for not putting the tire back in the trunk.
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Current Music:Stanton Moore - Green Chimneys
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Subject:Randomness
Time:04:22 am
I feel stretched too thin this week.

Work and school and driving is starting to wear me down, and make me bummed.

The most interesting thing to happen to me in thelast week is an intense conversation I had with another form of myself the other night. And then watching thousands of eyes staring at me whilst lying on my bedroom floor.

The last 3 days Ive had dumb girls at work ruin parts of my day. Just by being stupid and bitchy.

Thursday: Really unessecary rude comment from girl at work which pissed me off for at least an hour. The stupid girl doing the oppisite of what I tol dher NOT to do.

Friday: Stabbed in the middle of the elbow with a metla spatula by same stupid girl who didnt listen to me. Needless to say my right arm was out of commision for the next 40 mins and I was bummed.

Saturday: Dumb girl comes in bragging about taking 2 Valuum before work. So I inform her of how fucked she's going to be in 30 mins. Then having to listen to her bitchy about feeling so terrible the rest of the night. People can be so stupid.

But every night has been a fun adventure with old friends and strange company.

Tonight was the pinnacle of my week, and I feel pretty confident that [adult swim] sunday will be a good ending to a turbulent week.

I miss anyone that I commonly refer to as my pally.

Lets hope Dawn of the Dead will be as sweet as the remake of Night of the Living Dead.
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